OH, I SAY. Family First senator Stephen Fielding certainly knows how to attract attention. Headlining the political party's latest media missive, the senator posed this delightful question, ''Will there be a Fart Tax Mr Rudd?'' The press statement arrived ahead of the much-awaited green paper on the Rudd Government's emissions trading scheme, to be delivered today by Minister for Climate Change Penny Wong at the National Press Club. Fielding's media statement went on to say, ''The Rudd Government needs to say whether it will include the methane gas produced by cows and sheep in its emissions trading scheme. It might sound like a joke but penalising farmers for the gases produced by livestock is a serious matter ... Slapping extra costs on farmers because their animals fart is a serious problem, as the New Zealand Government found out when it was forced to drop its tax after farmers decided it was a stinker.'' Serious, indeed. Perhaps the Government will adopt a strategy pioneered by the National Institute of Agricultural Technology in Castelar, Buenos Aires. Argentine scientists have decided on a novel approach to studying global warming, by strapping plastic tanks to the backs of cows to collect their burps. Researchers say the slow digestive system of cows makes them a producer of methane, a potent greenhouse gas that gets far less public attention than carbon dioxide in efforts to fight global warming. We just love the pretty pink collection container.

Book in an artist

CANBERRA, get ready for your close-up. The organisers of the Yellow and White Pages directories are on the hunt for a member of the Canberra community to feature on the cover of the 2009-10 editions and they have asked for our help. The theme for next year's cover will be ''arts in the community'' and thus ''a community member who has contributed significantly to the arts and culture in the Canberra, Queanbeyan, or Yass community'' is the client brief. The arts theme covers many mediums: artists, teachers, volunteers even fund-raisers. There are a few ''must-haves'', namely a ''give back'' approach to the community, significant involvement in the arts and community and a proven track record of achievements. There is no age or professional barriers, however, recommended subjects must currently live, work or operate in the Canberra directory region (which covers Canberra, Queanbeyan, Yass and surrounding townships).

If you have anyone in mind that you would like to recommend, send in their name and contact details to today@canberratimes.com.au, a brief paragraph about the person and their achievements before July 21 and we will pass them along to the relevant powers that be.

Gasnier kicks off

SO Mark Gasnier is leaving for the slick and highly European Stade Francais rugby club.

But does this mean he will now end up in the club's yearly calendar, Dieux du Stade, an artistic production featuring nude Stade players? The eye-popping calendar is a seriously popular publication and sells out each year in increasing numbers, 200,000 last year alone.

The English translation of the title is Gods of the Stadium.

So Gasnier fans (especially female) take heart. Despite his move to France we could be seeing more of the footy star than ever before.

Big Brother turn-off

IT WAS only a matter of time. In the tradition of really bad jokes about dead celebrities (there were hundreds in cyberspace minutes after Steve Irwin's unfortunate encounter with a stingray) we arrived at work this morning to be offered, by email, various items of Big Brother memorabilia, including a T-shirt with the following slogan, ''Big Brother: No one is watching you ...''

Protests to a T

SPEAKING of T-shirts, within minutes of the Federal Court's ruling it was not illegal to annoy pilgrims, protesters had pulled on garments specifically designed to do just that. Pithy slogans include, ''I kissed the Pope's ring'', and ''I touched the Pope Down Under''.

Bon appetit at Pialligo

WE LOVE working up a good appetite, and this might be just the thing for it. Pialligo Village will host a progressive lunch on Saturday, August 2, sort of a road trip down gourmet lane. And it sounds charming.

''Taste and sip sparkling wine, nibble canape{aac}s at Pialligo Estate. If you feel energetic, enjoy a vineyard and olive grove tour and see the national monuments from a different perspective,'' the promo material reads. ''Beat your way through the plants, flowers, greenery and pots at Rodney's Nursery Garden Cafe to savour a banquet of three entrees; pass the organic gardens preparing for spring, and the grazing alpacas, to reach podfood at Pialligo Plant Farm where the main course will be served by award-winning podfood in the new gallery, on hand-wrought timber and steel banquet tables. Then on to an exhibition opening at Bison pottery. Finish with a range of desserts and coffee in front of the fire at Tulips Cafe.''

Bookings and further information, Sally Milner on 62476060; info@pialligoestate.com.au